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| Touchdown!: The Grey Poupon blimp hovers overlast year’s edition of “Gotterdammerung,” the Stutts-Keasbey football game. |
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It takes a special kind of person to be an athlete at Stutts. The kind of person who will keep playing, no matter what the score. The kind of person who won't listen to what the opposing crowd is chanting. The kind of person who likes to play…but loves to lose.
Though undersized, Stutts athletes are extremely diligent. They make up for their lack of ability by knowing every rule and following it to the letter. You may beat a Stuttsie—in fact, you almost certainly will—but she'll always know exactly how you did it.
Forging character on the field
Do you have what it takes to join Stutts' proud tradition of athletic excellence? Can we still call it a tradition if it hasn't existed since the late 1800's, when every other college began beating us at the games we invented—football, basketball, quoits? The only sports we excel at are the ones you can't make a living playing. And that's just the way we like it.
Because at Stutts, we play for the love of the game. And to keep the alums donating. Because we know it's not whether you win or lose, it's who ends up owning the team.
