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| Don’t wait: Our application is legendarily “comprehensive.” |
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Everyone agrees: where you go to college is the single most important decision in your life. It affects how much money you will make. It determines whether you will succeed in your chosen field. It even predicts the attractiveness of your eventual mate. Don’t you want to live in a beautiful, safe community? Don’t you want to give your children the same kind of opportunities you have had? Don’t you want to really stick it to all the people you went to high school with? Then you need to attend the most prestigious school possible, no matter what the cost. In today’s global, hypercompetitive, information-intensive economy, going to the wrong university isn’t only foolish, it’s a form of ritual suicide. With so much riding on it, why not go to the very best? Perhaps you can’t afford it, but can you afford not to?
“It’s such a kick to see my professor from ‘War & Empire’ on TV. I’ve never met him, but the grad student who teaches the class says he’s AWESOME.”—Parker Vanderkloot ’09
If you believe the above, you’re just the kind of person we’re looking for here at Stutts. You’ll have to believe this—and a lot more—to justify the awesome amount of money you’ll have to shell out to spend four years here with us.
“Let’s face it: you read the same textbooks at a lot of schools, but just walking around Stutts makes me feel smarter—better—than everybody else.”—Heather Kleist ‘11
But don’t let the cost stop you: get financial aid and pay it back later, when you’re rich and famous. You are going to be rich and famous, aren’t you? Of course you are—you will have attended the finest university there ever was. If you fail after a start like that, well, clearly it’s your own fault.
“Looking back, I think the most important thing Stutts gives you is totally inflated expectations, not only of yourself, but of everything. Then, when life doesn’t live up to it, you’re determined to succeed or die trying. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go slash my wrists.”—Mark Billingsley ‘02
Don’t be a loser, bet on your future. You’ve already wasted the first, best years of your life jumping through hoops, slaving for grades and racking up awards; giving up now would mean that all that effort was for nothing. Are you really better than everybody else? It’s time to prove it—or die trying.
Obsess for success.™ Apply today.
